Pitiful Prose // The IM Conversation

Pitiful Prosenew

Hello guys, and welcome back to the latest installment of Pitiful Prose, the segment where I belittle and bemoan my younger self’s writings.

I wrote this little ditty back in…2013, I think? Phones and texting were really becoming this huge thing, and I was eager to try my hand at writing an IM chat log. (For…some reason that I don’t know…)

It’s quite cringey, it will possibly make you laugh, and I hope you enjoy! 🙂

Dis Gon B Gud GIF

_________________________________________________

MaddieGladdie* –  R U coming 2 Mi house?

*This was back when I self-inserted myself into my stories. I changed her name to Madel, and gave her my nickname, so this was…really not that subtle.

JackinaBox* – I’ll be there @ 6. Kay?

*I actually kinda like this one for a username? It’s kinda cute. XD

MaddieGladdie – Sounds good. Is any1 else online?

JackinaBox – dont know.*

*Can I just say, it took a lot of willpower to make myself misspell words on purpose. So. Give me a round of applause.

MelMel – Hello??

MaddieGladdie – Mandy! u’re here!

MelMel – u’re here 2!

JackinaBox – any1 else?

MelMel – ummmmm….*

*Who writes an ‘um’ that long? Seriously? >_>

SmartCookie – Im here.

MaddieGladdie – hey Anna!*

*Why are you even bothering to use usernames if you’re just going to call each other by your names?

SmartCookie – hi. Sorry Im late.

MaddieGladdie – no big.

CoolKate – Hi!

MaddieGladdie – hey kate! Is Lia there with U?*

*…Why did you capitalize Lia…but not…Kate…?

CoolKate – just a sec, BRB*

*…where are you going?

JackinaBox – So… R U all coming 2 Mad’s house?*

*Nobody shortens Madeline, or even Maddie, to Mad. Literally nobody has ever done that to me.

MelMel – I am!

SmartCookie – me 2.

MaddieGladdie – Kate?

CoolKate – Im back! and Lia is logging in right now.

MaddieGladdie – kay!

XOLiaOX* – hey every1!

*Could I be more creative with these names? XD

MaddieGladdie – hey Lia! so is every1 here?

MelMel – yep.*

*Why are you taking the time to use punctuation, but still not capitalizing words and misspelling them?

MaddieGladdie – ok, great I need all of U @ mi house. can U make it?

CoolKate – Im free.

XOLiaOX – me 2!

MaddieGladdie – SO U’ll all come? CYA there!*

*I think my eyes are bleeding.

_________________________________________________*

*{Insert graceful cut here}

I log off and race to the door. as usual, Lia is here first. “hey Madel! Whats so Important?”

“I’ll wait till the other are here.” I say.*

*Ooh, who is the other? Are they the bad guy?? :O

Its just after dinner so everyone has to ‘wash up’ and clean themselves.*

*Wouldn’t you do that…before dinner? I’m so confused. -_-

Confused Lego Batman GIF

There you go, my first chat log! I don’t think I’ve ever written one since then…probably because even I thought it was cheesy and…pretty much pointless, plot-wise. Like, what even is happening in this scene? This whole thing could’ve taken less than a paragraph if I cut out all the ridiculous filler. XD

Does this look like a realistic text exchange to you? Or like an automated robot trying to be hip wrote it? Let me know in the comments!

New Until Next Time!

2 thoughts on “Pitiful Prose // The IM Conversation

  1. Okay, so first of all, I love this. I’m dying XD Super funny. Pretty unrealistic, too–looks like the TTYL series probably does, honestly. I think if you give preteens Instant Messaging and let them talk that might be what it would look like. XD

    Liked by 1 person

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